There are many prescriptions that indicate how to properly conduct memorial dinners. Some of them have their own justification in Christianity, others are alien to the worldview of the Orthodox person.
One of the traditions related to the commemoration is the practice of eating food at the memorial table exclusively with spoons. Often you can hear expressions that forks are strictly forbidden to eat at funeral ceremonies. However, this perception has nothing to do with the meaning of the Orthodox commemoration, therefore the Church does not prohibit the use of forks in the memorial meal.
It’s worth figuring out where the tradition of not using forks at funeral ceremonies came from. Often, adherents of such an opinion themselves cannot give a clear answer. Some suggestions can be made in this regard. So, historically, forks were not used during funeral feasts. However, this was not due to any religious precepts, but to the usual absence of forks as such in the old days. You can consider this issue from the household. For example, forks are undesirable because they are a sharp object that can injure a person. They were excluded from the memorial table setting, so that people, during the sharing of the inheritance, would not hurt each other in a rage. These explanations have nothing to do with Orthodox culture. It is difficult to imagine real Orthodox commemoration with a bloody massacre. If you look, it’s not the plug itself that is “evil, ” but a person who practices violence. According to such concepts, absolutely any subject can be forbidden, however, the Church in this sense does not reach madness.
Some consider the forks a reminder of demonic tridents, which contributes to the view of the fork as a demonic subject. But this perception should not have a place in human consciousness. If there are any indirect references to the presence of tridents or other sharp “tools” among demons, then this should be understood not purely materially, but figuratively. In light of this, it is completely wrong to transfer such ideas to our world, forbidding the use of a perfectly convenient object for eating food.
Thus, there is nothing to worry about using forks at the wake. The Orthodox person needs to focus not on such practices, but on the very essence of the remembrance, which consists in the memory of the deceased, prayer for him and doing good deeds as a memory of the dead.
