Compliments adore everything. Even those who, having heard them in their address, say: “What are you! Not worth it, right!”. Complimenting competently, while achieving the expected reaction, is art, science, psychology, and much more. You can learn this activity and develop this ability all your life. However, the sooner you learn the basics of this science, the easier it will be for you in the future.
Instruction manual
1
Honesty. It is honesty and truthfulness that compliment differs from approval and flattery. Only a small (very slightly) exaggeration of those qualities that the interlocutor wants to note in a particular person (for example, a man in a woman) is permissible. By the way, maybe he’s not going to embellish, but really thinks so
.2
Depth. A skillfully made compliment gives the possibility of speculation in the right direction. For example, it’s enough to tell the girl “What a beautiful dress on you”, how she will instantly finish painting. If the guy noted the dress, the girl thinks up, then he appreciated her impeccable taste, and the figure, and the image as a whole. Favor provided.
3
Conciseness. The compliment must be accurate and concise. One single thought is permissible in it (in extreme cases, two). If you begin to praise immediately appearance, and mind, and cordiality, and nobility, the words “blur” and lose all meaning. It will be an ode, not a compliment.
4
Accuracy. When voicing a compliment, doubleness is unacceptable. For example, you cannot say, "You are so pretty! Even fullness does not spoil you." Be sure, the girl will perceive only the second part of the phrase, and the first can be considered a mockery in the light of the second.
5
Empathy. This is called the ability to mentally take the place of another. If you want to compliment a person, imagine that you are him and that you would like to hear about yourself in his place. So you will most clearly understand that it is better to note - luck in cupid affairs or professionalism, academic success or achievement of children.
6
Witnesses. The compliment made by witnesses takes on greater significance than that delivered face-to-face. This is how a person works - he longs for social recognition and approval of his qualities. If your successful compliment sounded “in public”, you should know that you will be benefited or rewarded (with a prize, a kiss, a grateful look, an increase - depending on the situation).
7
Individuality. In other words, personification, a specific orientation. It’s not enough to say “How beautiful you are, ” you need to highlight something in appearance, in character, in the inner world of the interlocutor that he will perceive as something peculiar only to him (“How beautiful your hair!” Or “What you have extraordinary eyes! ").
note
One of the main components of a delicate and appropriate compliment is dosing. An overabundance of sweet words can cause a result opposite to the expected one, and even give rise to hostility towards you.
Useful advice
If you want to compliment, but did not find the right words in time and are confused, do not try to say at least something and at least somehow. Better openly, admiringly or respectfully (with a half bow) smile. This will be perceived favorably than banal and ill-conceived words.
